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Saturday, July 25, 2009

Crazy Adverts

I hate ads. If i want something, i'll look for it myself thankyouverruhmuch! And for the most part, ads are just stupid blah blah blah... our product is great because it's shinier than our competetor and you get a free turtle... blah blah blah...

But every now and then there is an ad so insanely avant garde that you just have to tell everyone about it.

Here are some such ads.


Handerpants- Underpants for your hands

I don't know how i've got through life so far without y-fronts on my hands!

Sunglasses that brighten the world, and give it HD clarity.

First of all, there are already horrible, plastic, cheap, crappy sunnies you put over your prescription glasses. You never see them on anyone under 90 because they are terrible! I will agree that the world looks better through polarised lenses though... especially window tint, which goes all LSD trippy and is likely to distract you while youre driving.

A vibrator for your Head.

I can just imagine the woman in the meeting saying "Can you just excuse me for five minutes while i apply a strap-on vibrator to my brain. I find it much better than medically supported tablets which would allow me to continue the meeting without issue... bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

And now it starts to get a little weird...

Crossdressing pest control

I admire this guy's commitment, but he's obviously a drag queen imposter. All the drag queens I've ever seen can keep in tune when they sing. I will not purchase services from an imposter. Good day sir!

Dead babies enjoying a milk shower

This is why I no longer consume dairy. I usually tell people some nonsence about ethics and how it's wrong to treat animals the way that they do on intensive factory farems, but the truth is that I once saw this going on in a paddock and have never been the same since.

Amazing acting skills despite a developmentally delayed eagle crapping on their roof

I don't know what to say about that. I just wish I was that brochure...

David Lynch's Sprite commercial

It's like speaking in tongues for your eyes!

Jungle porn juice

And I guess that's a good place to end. Using sex to sell a product has been around ever since the first wheel was being marketed, but what are we selling here? It seems like a subliminial advertisement for bestiality dressed up as a juice commercial! And seriously... the juice is called 'orangina'. I mean, c'mon... if your product is so bad you have to call it 'genital-pop' to sell it, you should probably rethink your objectives.

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